UNreasonable

[I was 'queueing up' at a vegetarian stall to get my dinner. This lady squeezed her way thru to the front and I tot she is looking at the dishes she want to choose. Fine. After the indian lady infront of me (which I graciously let her go first thou I was ahead of her as the queue line was a bit 'blur') was served, the lady uttered her order - she wanted to packet 2 dishes. I was like ...isn't my turn first?]
Me : EXCUSE me
[In mandarin]
Lady : What, I know this stall very well. That side got people standing. So, I order here.
Me : Then? So? You have to queue up. [I signalled to the lady ahead of me ... and claimed that I am in the queue, and next ... the indian lady said - dun bother nor quarrel with her.)
Lady : You got no 'feng du' ...what a man. You serve this man first (she signalled to the stall owner) Dun want to argue with you.
Me : What, me dun want to argue with such 'lao nu ren', so unreasonable. never queue.
Lady : I also dun want to argue with you 'lao nan ren'. [Me felt like boxing her ...]
I got my food, and walked away ...and turned around and said - Stupid woman!
I guess this woman must be using 'this tactic to get round queues' ...and me wun just give in. Haha.

Low

My self-esteem is not usually high. And it runs in the family.

Appraisals

This is the time of the year that everyone is busy/stressed with appraisals. In my current job, I had to handle this ...and guess what, I dun like the process and idea. In my prior job, I only need to provide inputs...now, I am tasked to co-ordinate it at a local level and worse, facilitate the sessions....sigh.... It is not easy, who am I to do this? this is HR matters. Does it then mean, I am destined to go back to 'HR work' when I just 'got out of it' 10 years agon to focus on comms work? Irony!

No Tea or Coffee

I dun drink coffee. I dun drink tea. I only drink horlicks (plain - no sugar, no milk) every morning. Maybe, thatz why I tend to feel sleepy. so easily.

Thank you, Boss!

Now that I am doing that aspect of work. I understand liao.Thank you to my ex-bosses, those who have given me good grades ...and those few who finally push me up for a promotion to a higher grade back in 2006. I feel bad that I am not quite good at 'presenting' my officers. And that is certainly not my forte.

Accountability. Responsibility.

I know I must accept it cos, I am paid (that much) for the 'accountability and responsibility' I need to shoulder. If and unless, I can afford to do something else, and not shoulder on. If not, I rest my case and continue with my work.

Not Vocal

To some, I may be vocal when it comes to matters that are of interest to me, e.g. myths of pregnancy, beauty/face care etc... but when it comes to work/official presentations, I tend to stumble. That's why nobody actually praise me, but it doesn't matter to me actually. Worse, these 2 years, I need to present my staff as part of the ranking process and sadly, I am not able to convince the panel, at times. (Lucky, I need not do so in the prev jobs.) [Maybe, preparing a script may help...haha.] This year, I also have to coordinate the ranking exercise, and it is really 'dua zhong' ...sianz. But compared to writing papers, i think it is easier lar....anyway, i am still hoping and searching for a change soon.

Plan

haha....suddenly my wife and I "hatched" a plan for ourselves. Sounds workable and interesting. Let us see how/if we can materialise it. If all things worked out fine, maybe maybe, I can 'retire' early? But that may mean I can't be conferred a National Day Award? (Congrats to my ex-boss who won the Public Service Medal (Bronze) this year!) But really, do I care? ...hmmmmmm...................

Bread!

I know I should be in bed, esp when I need to work 'later' but I just love this song so much so that I better post it up before I lost the link. Somehow, music and songs really tug me thou I know very well I dun have any musical talents to sing or play an instrument. Probably, I can still struggle in "Huang Jin Nian Hua" (haha...if I am still dying to perform...)
http://www.yue365.com/getgeci/7991/231196.shtml
夜深了我怎麼辦　寂寞了誰在身旁
心情變得好複雜　想她　念她　恨她
一個人你害怕嗎　細數過滿天星光
說好永遠不分開　多假 多假 多假
讓記憶長出翅膀飛翔
心放空了　寂寞好了
While I was watching the NDP 2010 earlier, the young ones were talking about 'living their dreams'... I tot - I can't possibly live my dreams now...cos I really have not much time left to do so and more because the responsibilities have changed and I am in a different 'stage of my life'. My dream is to bring enough bread for everyone in my family.

Master of None

It can be scary to know and realise that one's skills and knowledge gained in the initial years of one's career is no longer relevant, esp so when one switches job type and industry. And that may mean one is stuck in the last job ...and no where to go. Rightfully, aren't we supposed to broaden and deepen our basket of skills and knowledge?

Ideas for me?

Need some ideas from my readers.
This year, the theme for my D&D is "Careers Day".
I am thinking of what I should be on that day - what comes naturally would include Doctor, Army Personnel ...which is quite common.
Any suggestions? I jokingly blurted out - Swimming Instructor...haha
I may change 2 outfits ...

Charge

They are the new batch of scholars and warriors. Not me.
What I find amusing is the statement by the lady recipient...she loves to charge the forest.
Looks like she is certainly more 'gungho' than me. I am happy with what I am.
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/1073627/1/.html